A Hair of Another
by Kathiren
Summary: The Fellowship get new hair styles by three friends out to have a good time and a laugh. This is a funny storie and one in a series.


Title: The Hair of Another

Author: Chibi Johnson

Co-Author: CuB

Warning: Not much of a plot sexual hints just all around goofiness

Pairings: None

Summery: Silly hair fic, give me glorious hair long glorious hair. snickers

Brief history: one night in the dead of winter I and my roommate whom also is the co author went for a walk and for some reason really did start talking about guys pricks. And It was my roommate that said small people have small ones and she felt sorry for Dobby that talk inspired us both to write this story.

The Hair of Another, by Chibi Johnson and CuB

Peiko and CuB were walking in a thick wooded area, they had their wands out ready to defend themselves if any orcs happen to come upon them. "Hey CuB, do you think the different races at this time thought our kind a myth?" asked Peiko, peering around a tree.

CuB shrugged her shoulders, "Well I would guess so. For in this time the only ones known to do magic is males." she replies, poking at a bush with her wand.

Peiko sighed "You know, that is one thing I am going to miss about our home if we never get to go back there. It isn't unheard of for females to do magic where we come from."

CuB nodded her head, her black and green streaked hair falling over one of her brown eyes. "I agree. I was wondering; have The Fates got in contact with you to tell you why they sent us back to this time."

Peiko angrily kicked at a stick before answering "No. They have tuned me out for some reason."

CuB wore a long sweeping cloak; black in color. On the cloak was a badge that said 'Aurors.' Peiko wore a cloak much like CuB's, only her's was a deep blue. She also had the same badge as CuB, but she also had a second that said 'Fate in training.'

"Peiko since you are the best at map spells, can you tell me where exactly we are?"

Peiko murmured something under her breath and a light shot out of her wand and the light turned into a map. "We are four days out of Rivendale, according to my maps information."

Cub looked over her shoulder back from the direction they had come from. "Peiko I think it best to head back to the cave that we made into our home we left Neko alone and I don't want orcs to find her alone."

Peiko gave a small yawn " I think you are right, but hey CuB, who do you think has a bigger dingdong?"

CuB who had turned and started walking back in the opposite direction stopped dead in stride, shocked by the sudden change in topic. "Peiko! Your worse then me at times, but to answer your question I think Jonathan Davis has a big one."

Peiko shook her head "What would ever make you think that?"

CuB's eyes sparkled with laughter "His mick-stand of course."

Peiko who had walked past CuB who was still standing still, turned around to face her "Well I think Snape has a big one."

CuB began to walk again and she snorted at Peiko's revelation. "Of course you do, but mind telling me why?"

Peiko blushed slightly, "His wand of course. The longer and firmer the wand is the longer and thicker the man's dingdong is."

CuB closed her eyes shaking her head, "Tha's just like saying the bigger the shoe size, the bigger the dong." She only opened her eyes after tripping over a stick. "I think Dobby has a small one, the poor guy." Slowly standing back onto her feet.

Peiko gave CuB a confused look, "Why would you say that?"

CuB waved her hand in the air as if to say 'does it really matter' but, she answered the question anyways. "Because, he is small of course." CuB reached the hand that didn't hold her wand up to Peiko's black and blue streaker hair to pull a twig out of it that had become tangled.

Peiko had a hand clamped over her mouth trying to keep her giggles in, but through her giggles she said "I don't believe all short people have small ones. Take Gimli for example, I think he has a good sized one."

CuB shuddered as she thought of Gimli like that, sticking out her tongue. "If you like him so much while we are here why don't you sleep with him, instead of lusting over Legolas."

Peiko made a small gagging motion. "Heck no. I would never, his beard is all rough and tangled and his hair is tangled in with the beard."

CuB placed a hand on the entrance of the cave that they had just arrived at. "Then why don't you shave him?" CuB wasn't being serious she was only joking, but Peiko paused as if she was really thinking about it.

"Hum to tamper with the past like that, it sounds like fun. I think you have a good idea it will bring some excitement around here."

CuB's mouth gaped open, "I was only kidding Peik, I don't think we should mess up history like that." Peiko shrugged "It not like it will change anything CuB. You forget I can see things before they happen and see the consequences of choices and this will not stop them from completing their mission they will still save the world."

CuB sighed "I am not going to get you to change your mind will I?" Peiko shook her head 'no', then entered the cave ahead of CuB. "I can see now why you get along so good with Fred and George."

Neko, who was a girl with blond hair that had blood red highlights, looked up from where she sat on a green coach when Peiko entered.

"Hey Neko ready for some fun tonight?" snickered Peiko, moving to sit next to their young friend.

Neko raised an eyebrow. "What can you consider fun? We can't watch TV, or get on the net, and I don't even have a good book with me."

Peiko clamped a hand on the lounging girl's shoulder. "Ah well, I thought we could have a little fun with our friends of the Fellowship."

Neko looked over at CuB who had entered with confusion written all over her face. "What do you mean?"

Peiko snickered "We are going to shave Gimli's beard and maybe do something to the other members of the Fellowship."

Neko grabbed her wand and jumped up of the coach that they had made out of a rock. "And how do you suggest we cut his hair without him waking up."

Peiko pointed over to CuB who waved her wand at Neko. "You forget Neko I know sleeping charms and I can cast them good. Even though I still don't think this is a good idea. But, I will still play along. Never know, it might be funny to dye Gandolf's beard green or something."

Peiko, as CuB had been talking, had grabbed a hold of a small stone and had muttered an incantation changing it into a pair of scissors. Neko reached into her robe pocket that looked exactly like others robes and withdrew a hand full of hair ties. "Well these work for something?"

Peiko's eyes lit up even more when she saw these and nodded her head. "Of course we can go all wacky and wild with this thing." CuB in the mean time had grabbed a rock and had changed into a shaver.

Neko looked at the shaver that CuB held limply in her hand. "Um I have one last question how are we going to find the Fellowship?"

Peiko smacked her forehead "Did you forget I am good at tracking and homing spells?"

Realization dawned on Neko's face when Peiko said this. "Um Peiko, I think the best way to go about this is to have you transport yourself alone to where-ever the Fellowship is at."

Peiko nodded pulling the hood of her cloak over her head. "I will follow them from a distance with my tracking spell I will stay with them tell they stop to make camp and then I will come back."

Before anyone could speak again, Peiko had disappeared with the name of the Fellowship members and words in French after the names. Her spell had no trouble finding the Fellowship, once she had appeared within sight of them. She moved back further from them cloaking herself and trailing them as they walked. She didn't have to follow them long before Aragorn gave the order to make camp. Peiko could barely keep herself from giggling with joy. She clasped a hand over her mouth hoping she would be able to find out who was keeping the watch for the night. She wasn't disappointed after everyone had laid their bedrolls out and Gimli had checked around the camp for safety measures.

"Who wants first watch to night?" Aragorn barked out at the others who were completing various tasks around camp.

"I and Pippin will." Merry responded a sheepish smile across his face.

Aragorn turned to Boromir, "Boromir you shall keep watch with the two half lings."

Peiko gave a small jump of joy she swished her wand saying a silent spell as she does so this spell would insure that when the three friends where ready, they would instantly be transported here. Peiko quickly spelled herself back to the cave, once there, she took off her vanishing spell. "All right its all set. They have made camp for the night, and I also found out who will be on first watch. It's the two halflings, Merry and Pipin also Master Boromir will be on watch with them."

Neko was practically vibrating in place with eagerness "Let's go then." laughing with an evil intent to cause mayhem and chaos.

Peiko sighed "Calm down, when I take each of you in hand we will instantly be transported nine feet outside of their camp. So we must be silent until CuB can successfully put in place her sleeping spell do you understand?"

Neko nodded her head quickly CuB rolled her eyes "No duh."

Peiko held out her hand "Than come, each of you take a hold of my hand and we shall be transported together." CuB was the first to grab hold than Neko who dug in her nails in her excitement to do so. Peiko gritted her teeth from crying out at this, CuB smacked Neko with her wand hand when she noticed Peiko's distress.

"Loosen your grip, baka-brain!" CuB practically growled at Neko who whimpered and loosened her grip.

The three girls arrived without problems, and they were lucky enough to arrive after all the followers had fallen asleep besides the three that where on watch. CuB put a finger to her lips before using a vanishing spell disappearing. Peiko, not trusting Neko, placed a hand over her friend's mouth, waiting for CuB's signal. She didn't have to wait long, CuB sent orange sparks up into the air signaling that all had fallen asleep. Peiko dropped her hand away from Neko's mouth and began to run in the direction of the camp Neko close on her heels.

"Who has the scissors?" Peiko held out her hand signaling she would like them so she could get started.

Neko dropped them into her hand. "Where we going to start?"

Peiko nodded in Gimli's direction along with Sam and Frodo's. "I will take care of Gimli, you two can have fun with Sam and Frodo." Peiko looked down at the snoring dwarf and crinkled her nose he snored like a boar. Peiko kneeled onto the ground and began her work she took a hold of the end of his braided beard and began to try and snip it. "This thing is tougher then shoe leather."

As Peiko worked on Gimli's beard CuB began on Frodo she had began to put permanent hunter green highlights in his hair with her wand. Neko worked on Sam she had made a second pair of scissors and had started sniping hair soon it was short and Neko used a spell to make it stick up in spikes she giggled with mischief.

"Hey Peiko what do you think of Frodo?" asked CuB.

Peiko glanced over at him. "It suits him well. What do you think of Gimli?"

CuB looked over at the now cleanly shaved Gimli, "I think you may need to use that shaver to shave his hair he looks like a clown without his beard." Peiko nodded in agreement. CuB's next stop in members was Gandof. Neko decided to work on Boromir.

Peiko spelled the shaver to shave Gimli's head with out her. As the shaver did its work Peiko moved on to Legolas where she chanted another spell this one put dark blue streaks through out Legolas' hair.

CuB looked over from where she was working and snorted "Nice touch, but I think you should braid all his hair."

Peiko bit her lower lip as if to think "Your right." Neko who was listening in tossed the baggy of hair ties. Neko was giving Boromir a Mohawk.

"Hey Neko, look what I did to Gandof." CuB stepped aside so Neko could see how she had made Gandof's hair many colors.

"No way, how tacky." Neko's lips twitched she was trying to keep a straight face.

Peiko looked over at what CuB had done and smiled. "At least his hair now matches his fireworks." Peiko jumped because she was startled as the shaver that had been shaving Gimli's hair hit the ground, signaling that it was done. Peiko than looked down at Legolas to see how his hair was coming and decided it wasn't working fast enough. So she cast a spell that would do her work faster for her. Her attention then turned to Aragorn, she had a perfect idea to style his hair. Peiko waved her wand and Aragorn's hair went from brown to pitch black and with another wave of her wand his beard totally vanished. Once finishing turned her attention back to Legolas to see how her spell was coming along she gave a relieved sigh to see that the spell had almost finished its work.

"Neko, when your finished with Boromir, come help me with Merry and Pippin." Peiko skipped over to where the two mischievous hobbits where resting. Peiko summoned the shaver to where she stood behind Pippin. A hand grabbing onto her shoulder made her jump.

"Peiko what do you need me to do?" asked Neko.

Peiko waved her wand making another shaver arrive and held it out to her. "We're going to shave words into their hair. Pippin's hair is going to have the words 'Foolish Hobbit' and on Merry, who you are going to take care of, is going to have 'Pippin's Lover'."

Neko snickered as she pressed the button on the shaver, but she became silent once she placed the shaver to his head. Peiko used wordless magic to help her make the words small on Pippin's head so she could get it all to fit.

CuB had finished Gandolf, and had nothing to do but wait for Peiko and Neko to finish. That is tell she noticed what Peiko had done to Aregon's hair she shook her head. Saying to her self; 'That isn't right, he needs something more done to him." So she pulled out her wand waving it as she pictured a mullet in her mind and the spell she spoke did the rest of her work.

"What did you do!" Peiko's shrill voice yelled from directly behind.

Whom clasped a hand at her chest. "How many times baka-brains, do I have to say don't sneak up behind me?"

Peiko grabbed her arm roughly turning her, "Why did you give him a mullet?"

Cub gave a devilish smile "Because, he needed more done to him, but now's not the time to fight. The Sleeping spell will ware off soon and it wouldn't be good to be seen in their camp." Peiko got ready to say something else, but CuB placed her hand over Peiko's mouth as Neko said the teleporting and cloaking spell.

The three girls where teleported to a group of bushes fifty yards off, but with a extended vison spell CuB spoke after removing her hand from Peiko's mouth, let all three girls see the Fellowship as if they were standing next to them.

Peiko wisely remained silent, as she watched what happened in the following moments. The first to awaken from the spell was Gandalf. Peiko stuffed a fist in her mouth as he made a grunting sound as if he had been jabbed in the ribs to be woken up. One of his hands went to his beard to scratch it and that's when his eyes widened, for they got the first glimpse of the multi-colored beard he now sported.

"Fools whom is playing such dastardly tricks!" Gandalfs eyes turned to Merry and Pippin and his face became red as anger flared in him. For they both still slept on, sporting an even weirder hair cut than himself.

Legolas was jarred awake from his light elven sleep by Gandalf's outraged yell. As he looked upon Gandalf he couldn't help but laugh.

"And what are you laughing at Master Elf? Your hair doesn't look much better. In fact, it reminds me of an elvish blueberry." Came a gruff voice from next to him. Of course it was Gimli.

"Yeah well, Master Dwarf, I think you should check on your beard. Its looking a little on the sparse side of things." Legolas jumped up from where he sat, before the dwarf could take out his anger on him. Finding his beard totally gone.

Aragorn grunted, his eyes still closed he spoke in a husky voice. "What's all the commotion about? We need our sleep, we have a long journey ahead of us tomorrow." Aragorn was silenced when Boramer whom had awakened soon after Gandalf threw his rolled up bed at his head. Aragorn's eyes opened and as his eyes moved from one Fellowship member to the other his body began to shake with suppressed laughter.

"Strider, I don't see the humor in this." cried Frodo as he looked at Sam's hair.

"I knew MasterStrider shouldn't have trusted those two to watch our camp as we slept! They get lost just walking through Farmer Maggot's fields!" stated Sam, fussing over Frodo's hair.

Boremer had drawn his sword and was stalking around the area near the camp looking for any traces there might be of the ones that did this.

Aragorn had finally controlled his laughter and gave a pained snort. "Well it could have been worse, we all could have been murdered in our sleep."

Legolas came back into the camp from the direction of the water and he looked a bit green in the face. "This awful color will not come out of my hair." Legolas snapped his angry gaze over to the two still sleeping Hobbits. He slunk over behind them, thinking to himself. 'How could these two sleep through this commotion? And why did he and the fellowship have to put up with their dumbness?' Than he yelled right into the prankster hobbit's ears. "I thought I told you to stay out of my fields!" mimicking the voice of farmer Maggot. The two hobbits jumped in fright and then their eyes grew larger as two elven daggers where placed to their throats. "We trusted you on duty, and what's the first thing you two pesky hobbit's do? Fall asleep! You both are lucky I have an oath not to kill you, or I would have by now! I suggest next time you leave home keep your sexual preferences at there." one of his daggers moves up and points at Merry's head.

Peiko pulled the fist out of her mouth and gave a sigh, "Ah well. All's well that ends well." CuB thrust a note into Peiko's hand. She rolled her eyes. "I all most forgot about this." Peiko used a levitate spell to have the rolled parsley shoot through the air and land in Pippin's lap.

Pippin, who was trying to hide his face from all the murderess glares, gasps as something landed in his lap he looks down at it and sees its addressed to him and the fellowship he opens and begins to read.

_I, Pippintook, am a clumsy moron that wouldn't know a joke from a sarcastic reply. I have endangered the Fellowship from a thirst of ignorance. Merry is my companion. He is also the more dominant. Each hair style you sport, you will wear gladly. You will never find who did this it you, you will start believing it was spooks. We arn't of course these spooks, but simple little pranksters. We're the kind that would stretch your underwear or put sugar in your bed. Well I must stop this letter now, so I can finish predicting the future._

_Signed,_

_Fate in training and all around prankster_


End file.
